Your Blues Are Not Like Mine

 

 

I’m making an appointment to go see my doctor for a physical today.  That’s saying a lot because I don’t like going to the doctor, at all.  Two reasons: I’ve always had a weight problem and I’m afraid they will find something wrong with me.  I would always get the lecture about my weight, so I did something about that in 2003.  I’ll blog about that on  another post.  Friday I felt like crap, I couldn’t stay cool, my head was racing from everything I’ve got going on and I was on edge for no reason at all (to my family).  You see, this is part of menopause and it’s time I stop trying to handle this on my own and get some professional help.  I talked with a friend Friday who I’ve been knowing since I was 5 years old.  We’ve been through a lot together, and we were just discussing our lives.  I was telling her how I was feeling, we laughed at the situation and when we finished our conversation, I decided I was tired of feeling this way and I’m gonna make an appointment.  

I was talking to my husband yesterday morning and he told me I sound like I may be battling some form of depression at this time.  Who, me??  After I thought about it, I know it has to be menopause, the “thing” that my mom and other women her age didn’t like talking about.  It was never discussed, just called “the change”.  We are a different kind of woman today, the internet is our resource to everything.  I will “google” something in a minute, but I can’t on this.  I’m tired of being exhausted, hot, irritated and not feeling myself.  Gotta bad case of the blues, mixed with a does of menopause.

One of the things I’m gonna try and do twice a week is just to get out of the house if it’s just to go around the corner.  I need to get out especially before it gets too cold, but I’ll welcome that because I’m so hot all the time.  I don’t like being in clothes, because my hot flashes are that bad.  We went to the commissary yesterday afternoon and I had my window down and the sunroof open and I looked over and husband was complaining about how cold he was.  It was 75 and beautiful, but we found a middle ground and rolled up the windows and left the roof open.

I’ve been going through this for the last three years, but the intensity of it has increased in the last six months.  I’m researching hormone replacement therapy so I can ask about it when I go to the doctor.  Pray for me ya’ll because I want to get back to where I was, get my energy, body temperature below 120 degrees, and stop feeling like the crazy lady.  

*****UPDATE******

I have a doctor’s appointment next Monday, so glad I took that step.  You all don’t know how hard it was for me.

 

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AARP and Middle Aged

This is the face and story of a middle aged woman….

 

 

I started receiving invitations from AARP about 5 years ago via email.  I was kind of offended, I wasn’t old enough for AARP yet, at least I thought so.  Each time I would get something via email or mail, I would joke about it on Facebook.  One friend told me that they offer great discounts and I should check it out.  Discounts?  I sure will, I’ll take advantage of any membership that offers discounts, period.  My husband will ask about a military discount in a heart beat.  I don’t blame him, he earned it.  Ok fast forward 5 years, I have liked the AARP page on Facebook, and they posted a question asking people to name the Kardashian’s in order.  People started going off about who cares and why would they post something so stupid?  I could name Kim, Kourtney and mom Kris, that’s all.  I still can’t think if the others without hitting the Google.  It made me think, do we become less accepting when we get older?  These people were really cranky about the question, I mean going off saying they should focus on other things instead of the Kardashian’s.  It was just something for fun, a trivia  question.  Criticize the Kardashian’s if you want, but Kris Jenner is a hell of a good business woman.   Has she made mistakes?  Yes, but that comes with business.  Lighten up people, I don’t plan to lose my sense of humor or act like I’m ready to be put in the nursing home.  

There is another page on Facebook that I’ve liked, “Black Women Are Sexy”, they show different pictures of women, write positive affirmations and other interesting things black women may be interested in.  They posted a picture of a woman this morning, giving her name and age.  She was 47 years old and had on a short dress that was fitting and hitting her curves.  People cut this woman up so bad, mostly women.  I don’t like how the internet has allowed people to be mean to the point that it’s hurtful.  I realize when you upload pictures on the internet, you take your chances.  Check it out here, it’s not a look that I would do, but that’s what makes us different, and we have the right to wear our hair and the kind of clothing that we please.  Most of the responses were from younger women that kept saying, her body is ok, she looks good for her age like she was 70.  Here’s one thing about black women, if you take care of yourself from those early adult years, you know…..when others are abusing drugs or drinking heavily, staying up all night, heavy partying, then when you are 45 and up you will be able to hold on to your looks.  I can only speak for myself.  My class reunion was two years ago, and time hadn’t been kind to some of the women, but I’m telling you, it was because of the abuse they put their bodies through when we were younger.  

One of the reasons I started this blog was to blog about my journey, and to support women over 40.  We don’t really have a platform, we get an article here or there.  We have a magazine, but they changed it to add women age 30.  When I was 30, I wasn’t thinking about age 40 until I had a baby at 38.  I want to brand myself, the middle aged diva.  Life is what you make it at any age.  As my momma used to say….keep on living.  Isn’t that the truth.


 

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Lovely Day

 

My best friend from high school was in town yesterday.  We went to Oprah’s Lifeclass (more on that in a later post).  She lives in Tulsa, OK and I live in St Louis.  We are from Kansas City, MO.  We haven’t spent time together in probably 23 years when I went to Tulsa to visit her many years ago.  She would come see me when I lived in Kansas City, but we haven’t had a day to have fun in a long time.  I miss her, and remember why we are such good friends.  She is my sister, I had the stronger personality, louder and bolder.  She is outspoken, she did it in a gentler, less vocal way than me.  I think that’s what I loved about her.  We met in the 10th grade, and immediately became friends.  I remember when her mom came to my house to meet my parents, so we could really hang out and go places together and really be good friends.   It was six of us who used to hang out together, but she and I were the closest.  We have been through so much together, I was her maid of honor at her wedding, she was mine, been through death of our parents and the challenges we’ve both had in our adult lives.  We have both shared secrets that we are taking to the grave, and we celebrate life and the love of God together.

We went to the mall, shopped, laughed and talked, took pictures together like teen aged  girls holding the cell phone up and cheesing for the camera and even asked strangers to take pictures of us.  We went to the Cheesecake Factory for lunch and didn’t even eat cheesecake!   I regret that now of course, because it’s back to the grind.  The cheesecake is rich and I was too full to eat anything else.  I know, should have gotten that to go.  We talked about our mid-life journey, keeping our youthful looks, but not looking like we are 20 or 70.  Shopping at our age can be a challenge, because a lot of the clothing is made for younger women.  I absolutely LOVE Nordstrom Rack, we had a ball there.  I discovered she loves 4-5 inch heeled shoes, while I was looking wedges and cute flats.  I was disappointed at Macy’s, but can always find a bargain.  The Plus Size department in Macy’s had clothing made for women more conservative than I am.  My bestie agreed too.  We are both beautiful plus sized, fashion forward women and neither one of us ever have a problem finding beautiful clothes.  

I just spoke with my friend this morning before they hit the road back to Tulsa.  We made a promise to see more of each other and that means me going to Tulsa to see her.  It’s not something we can do every month because of our busy lives, but we will plan trips to visit one another.  Thank you Veronica for the wonderful day and for remembering that we must take time for each other, and nurture our relationships as well.  I love you dearly.

 

Whitney or as you affectionally know me….Mick

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