Ever feel like you are at your wits end? If one more thing in your life goes wrong, and you will completely lose it? That is where I was today, about to go over the end. Seems like I haven’t gotten anything but bad news or situations for the last month. It has made me question if this move was the best thing for us. I’m not really feeling sorry for myself, just have a lot going on and wanted to complain about it. I don’t mean to rant, I just get frustrated about what’s going on in my life at this time. My husband even said today that maybe we should have stayed in St Louis. I gave the phone a serious “side eye” when he said that.
Then you read about someone losing a loved one, their home, having no food to eat, dealing with all kind of illness, physical and mental. It really bothers me when I see or read about children that are homeless or hungry. I have a nephew who is paranoid schizophrenic, who isn’t doing very well. I then become ashamed of myself and realize how blessed I am. I don’t ever want to come across as a spoiled, ungrateful woman who can’t see past her own little issues. I’m far from that, just got caught up with “me”. Seems like right now everyone has a little something going on in their lives, everyone I’ve talked to since I’ve been back is going through one thing or another. I have to step out of my pitifulness and realize things could be worse. This is just a test, I don’t want to fail it.
All these minor things can be fixed, repaired or will just have to simply wait until the money is available. I wanted everything fixed yesterday, I’m so impatient….then I wonder why my girls are like that??? I found someone who will be able to do the repairs to our home, one room/project at a time. He was a sweetheart and fixed my water lines so I could have hot water in the house and we could bathe and do laundry. The hubs was pleased with him too, which is hard because he can be hard on people.
The clouds do clear and make way for the sun….and life goes on. Sometimes you just have to encourage yourself, and remind yourself how blessed you really are. One of my favorite songs, enjoy.