Currently - cafe mocha reflections

Young Love ~ First Date

June 17, 2013 by Whitney 10 Comments

I enjoy my children and watching them go from babies to the young ladies they are today. My oldest is loving, quiet and loves music. My youngest is inquisitive, athletic, loving and very opinionated. This is their personalities and who God intended for them to be. I knew the phase of boys, love and everything associated with it would happen. Here’s my daughter’s story and her “first date”.

My daughter reconnected with a friend of hers when we were in Kansas City last year. She met him in elementary school and he is autistic, just like she is. They have been planning this meeting/trip for at least a month. My daughter was so excited, talked about it every day this week, I mean every day. I took her to buy a friendship card for him and she picked an appropriate card with my help. The young man, his mom and baby sister (8 months old) arrived around 11:00. We were outside waiting because they took a wrong turn. He introduced himself to me, gave me a firm handshake and hugged my daughter for what seemed like 2 minutes. It was so long, his mother had to tell him they better get going. He was quite the gentleman, opening the door to the minivan for my daughter. The mom gave me their agenda, the Gateway Arch, Museum, lunch and then the zoo. They were gone all day, I wondered how she was doing but I didn’t call. I did send her a text that she didn’t answer. I didn’t freak out, I just figured she was having fun and her phone was in her purse.

I talked to my daughter and explained to her that if she felt uncomfortable at all to call me and I would come and get her. I also made sure she had money to pay for her own food. The plan was for the friend to treat her to lunch but I also told her that she could buy her own lunch and spend her money if there was a problem. I remember my momma having this same talk with me when I started dating. She was prepared and ready for her day with her friend.

They showed up and we were standing outside waiting because they took a wrong turn. He jumped out and hugged her and his mom and I talked for a few minutes…you know getting info on where they were going from the mother, just to make sure everyone was on the same page. They had plenty of water and drinks because they were gonna be outside all day. My daughter’s friend was quite the gentleman, opening the door and helping her in the minivan. They took off and I was happy for my daughter because she doesn’t have many friends and socializing is a challenge for her.

Around 5:00 they showed up and everyone looked worn out, even the poor baby. She had been crying, she was just probably sleepy. I watched as her friend got out of the minivan, ran and opened the door for my daughter. It was so sweet, it really was. She was still smiling, exhausted but happy. The whole crew was tired. Mom ran the day down and how my daughter did, sometimes people with Autism will have melt downs. Seems like she got through the day but she did complain about the baby crying, she’s not used to being around babies. I asked her to apologize, she did and felt bad.

She took some great pictures and we talked about the day and what I asked her how she felt about the young man. She told me they were friends and wouldn’t be able to be girlfriend/boyfriend until after she turned 18. I’m so glad she had a good time and I can live with not having a boyfriend until after she turns 18.

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Filed Under: Currently, Family, Relationships Tagged With: autism, dating, first date, love, teenagers

Father’s Day Gift Ideas

June 14, 2013 by Whitney 8 Comments

Here’s some gift ideas for the father in your life. Some are practical and some are for those that like to really treat that special father/man in their life. Enjoy!

A Coach baseball glove?? What’s your thoughts on this one?

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Coach Inc on Pinterest

I would like to have this for my own iPhone.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via REI on Pinterest

I thought this would be good for the jogger/walker or anyone that likes to use a water bottle. See the slot for your phone?

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via

Dad could use a good pair of sneakers

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via New Balance on Pinterest

A nice little sweet treat to go with the coffee on Sunday morning.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Linda King Wiseman on Pinterest

Happy Father’s Day to all dads!

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Filed Under: Currently, The Man Cafe Tagged With: father's day, gifts, pinterest

Emergency Preparedness

June 10, 2013 by Whitney 9 Comments

We had a severe storm and tornado in the St Louis area on May 31st. This is my third spring here and every year there has been a major tornado that has cause major damage to the communities around here including Lambert Airport. I’m talking devastation, where you look and only imagine how people have survived such a storm. We survived the storms and I’m blessed for it, but for those that were so lucky my hearts go out to them at this time.

When people have lost all of their possessions they are really at a lost and not sure where to start. It made me think about when you get homeowners or renters insurance they want you to compile a list of all your possessions and send it to them. I’ve compiled this list of things to prepare you for an emergency. I hope it’s helpful because at the time you have the emergency, the last thing you want to worry about is trying to figure out what you have and where everything is. Once you get over the shock of the devastation, then it’s time to clean up and file claims with the insurance company.

Take inventory of all your valuables.
Have a small safe to put all important paperwork, pictures or anything that you can refer to for the insurance company.
Take pictures and/or video of your home and valuables.
Put the information on a flash drive and keep in your safe place.
Practice your escape plan or where you and the family will be going in the house for safety.

Once you all are safe and everyone accounted for, this would also be a good time to go to social media to let family and friends know you are safe. This works because sometimes phones lines are down or the towers for cell phones are either down or just not able to handle all the calls and/or text messages. I went to Facebook to let everyone know we were ok and I got a few phone calls and texts throughout the day from people that don’t do social media.

The clean up process is steady around here, the tree companies are super busy. There are tree limbs and parts of trees everywhere. Here a few of the pictures that I took after the storm, amazing.

No one likes thinking about disasters happening to them, this has happened so much in the last few years I thought it was necessary. If you can think of anything to add to the list, let me know so I can add. Have a wonderful day everyone.

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Filed Under: Currently, Health & Wellness Tagged With: emergency preparedness, storms, tornado

Are You Honey or Vinegar on Social Media?

June 4, 2013 by Whitney 18 Comments

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Do any of you remember the saying, “You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar”? We could sure use this old saying in today’s world. I try to approach everything I do or people I encounter with a positive attitude. Trust me, some days are so hard, but I keep pushing forward. One of the reasons I changed my thinking about life was when I became a mother. I wanted my girls to be positive and be kind to people and I wanted them to see me dealing with people in that manner as well. I haven’t been as successful as I should have, but I take every situation they witness as a teachable lesson. This is part of the reason they don’t have any social media accounts yet, I know what’s out there and I want to keep it out of their lives as long as I can. My youngest wants a Instagram account, only with my supervision. You all know some of the foolishness that goes on with these social media platforms.

I belong to a natural hair group on Facebook, most of the women that post and share pictures are young women under 25. Most of the time, I glance at their post and hit like on their pictures and keep it moving. Some of those young women are so creative with their hairstyles, it’s one of the reasons I haven’t left the group. This is one of my pet peeves about social media, we share too much personal information with people we don’t know. Last week, one of the young ladies posted a picture of a married couple wearing an African inspired outfit. She said that she shared the picture on her Instagram account and her fiance, who is white posted a comment saying that it would never happen and said “black power”. She went on to talk about how they disagreed about what he said and what she could do to show him that he was wrong. That became one of the longest threads I’ve ever seen, it was awful. I even commented by saying that personal issues should be handled with the person, not Facebook. Others agreed, but most people took the opportunity to attack the girl, her fiance and the situation. The comments were negative and immature and the admin of the group had to finally remove the post.

Why people chose to be negative on social media is just perplexing. It’s a form of bullying to me, it gives them the ability to say the craziest things and hide behind their computer. I will delete people and posts that are used to attack people or a situation. It just isn’t necessary to be that way, some people are just miserable. You don’t have to be super sweet, but use your social media accounts to pass along a little positive vibe every once in a while. Trust me someone who needs a little encouragement will receive it and maybe thank you, like the post, or favorite it on their Twitter feed. Who knows, we could be the only positive image that person get to see in their life for the day. You never know what’s going on with someone behind the computer, tablet or smart phone.

Encouragement and supporting women have become a great concern of mine and what I try to share on my blog. Social media isn’t going anywhere, it’s growing more and more. I’m sure in the next 10 years there will be more platforms than the ones we have now. Cyber bullying and negativity is serious, keep it off your accounts and let those bullies know you don’t have time for that.

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Filed Under: Currently, Inspirational Tagged With: bullying, encouragement, inspiration, negative people, social media

Weekend Memories

May 13, 2013 by Whitney 10 Comments

Had a great weekend. Saturday the girls and I hung out all day. They wanted to go shopping to buy me something for Mother’s Day. We went to the Air Force Base it was grocery shopping day out there, and they love going. They were having a drawing on some items for Mother’s Day, so I decided to enter. Guess who was the first winner? That’s right me! Here’s what I won…

I love wristlets, I own 4 and to think I won a nice Coach one? Loving it. I was so excited, I wanted to do my happy dance, but my daughter had the nerve to tell me not to embarrass her. I should have broke out, but I was too excited about winning! A free gift, too awesome!

My girls were very giving generous with mom, they spent their allowance to buy me a gift. I told them to just buy one card because greeting cards are so expensive and didn’t want them to spend all their money. This is what they bought me. Too cute, it’s on my desk. My youngest picked this, I just know she did. I appreciate them so much, we had a ball Saturday.

We attended church yesterday, very good service. It was packed of course. I thought about my momma a few times, I did ok until I was sitting in the car by myself. I miss her a lot. We didn’t go out to dinner like I wanted because I had a lot of work to do that needed to be completed by today, so I spent the rest of the day at my desk working. Then I got my gift from my husband.

I’ve never had Shari’s Berries before. They were good, very sweet…very. The girls will probably enjoy a few of them. I could only eat one, they were huge. I had a good weekend, blessed and grateful for the love of my family. How was your Mother’s Day/weekend?

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Filed Under: Currently, Family Tagged With: family, gifts, mother's day

Protect Your Identity

April 23, 2013 by Whitney 4 Comments

Image courtesy of chanpipat via FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Saturday I received a call from our bank wanting to verify some purchases made with our debit cards. We were both home Saturday, the call came in at about 9:00am. It was an automated system and they started asking about purchases made on Saturday at Walmart. Neither one of us had been out of the house so I immediately got very nervous. When I verified that neither one of us had made the purchases, I was transferred to a representative that told me she had to cancel my husband’s debit card because someone had been fraudulently using it. The purchases were made in Pennsylvania and South Carolina. I began asking all kinds of questions, she reassured me that they protect our account and are covered 100% by the bank. It was truly scary sitting there listening to how someone was trying to spend our money that we worked hard for. It makes you vulnerable, we have so much that we have to do in this life, now we have to make sure someone isn’t trying to steal our identity or hard earned money?

One of the grocery store chains here had a security breach and people all over the metropolitan St Louis area that shopped at that store and used their debit cards were having fraudulent activity on their cards. I’m sure we were a part of that because my husband goes their while he’s working to purchase lunch. They are talking big lawsuit here, just gotta investigate and see if that’s where they got our info from.

Less than two weeks ago, I was watching the Rikki Lake Show and the episode was about identity theft and fraud. I heard some horror stories how people have had their identity stolen and how hard it was to repair your credit and get your life back in order. One woman even investigated her own case and found the woman that had stolen her identity. She called the police and confronted the woman who ran from her. I watched the rest of the show and the experts that she had on the show said we could do the following things to protect ourselves:

1. Don’t pay for gas at the pump, go inside and use credit instead of debit.

2. Don’t use ATM’s that you can drive up, try going inside to a machine.

3. Use cash as much as possible.

I can probably adhere to all of those, not using the ATM will be tough, I’m so used to going to one and then going on my way. The expert that Rikki Lake had on the show said that thieves have a device that they put inside ATM card reader that when you swipe your card, they get your information. She recommended that we not use the ATM”s outside, go inside and use the ATM machines. We all shop online and I may have to start using Paypal more. It’s supposed to be more secure, I have a Paypal account and I will utilize it more.

You may also want to check everyone in your household’s credit, even the children because their identity can be stolen too. One woman on the show spent two years trying to clear up her teen aged daughters credit. None of us are protected against these thieves, so we have to be proactive. We have considered Lifelock but we just don’t want another bill at this time, but it may be worth it.

I don’t like carrying cash, because I feel like I spend more when I have it, but I’m gonna have to start using the cash option. Protect your identity, it’s the only one you have. Have any of you been victims of identity theft and do you have any other tips to share on protecting your identity?

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Filed Under: Currently, Lifestyle Tagged With: credit, fraud, identity theft

The Best Time of Day

April 19, 2013 by Whitney 8 Comments

I am a morning person. My husband gets up around 4:30 and I wake up on my own around 5:15, he’s on his way to the basement to do his daily ritual and I start mine. I do my daily bible reading, mediate and pray. I also spend this time of the day to reflect on the day before and my plans for the day. Then I watch a little news until I go check on the girls to see how their morning is going. My oldest is just about ready to leave, she’s a morning person too and greets me with “good morning mom!” and my baby, I have to almost drag her out of the bed. I used to fuss at her but I refuse to allow that to ruin my morning, so I open the door look at her and she gets up and gets started. I love giving the look to my kids.

I function on a greater level in the morning, I’m refreshed, clear thinking and can get so much work done. House cleaning, writing, meetings and running errands all get done early. When I worked in an office environment, I would walk in refreshed and ready to work in a pleasant frame of mind and sometimes cheerful, speaking to everyone until one of my friends reminded me that not everyone was a morning person. Oops, sorry.

My husband and I have some of the best conversations at 3:30 in the morning. That’s when he has rested and clears his mind. It’s also when he is his most open and has a certain vulnerability that he doesn’t usually let out very often. We woke up a many early mornings after my mother-in-law passed away in 2011. We discuss our plans, dreams and goals. Then he turns on the TV and we watch whatever is on MSNBC. I usually fall back asleep by then if we stop talking.

With morning being my favorite time of day means that by 8:00-9:00pm it’s a struggle to stay up, except for Thursday nights. I will not miss Scandal, but I do record it just in case I can’t stay awake to watch it. I try to watch the evening news, spend some time with my girls and then it’s usually lights and TV off by 10:00. It’s important I sleep well at night, women should get plenty of rest.

It’s really been a hard week for our country and I’m praying for peace, our safety and love. What is the best time of day for you?

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Filed Under: Currently, Health & Wellness, Inspirational Tagged With: marriage, mornings, rest, work

Prayers For Boston and the World

April 16, 2013 by Whitney 4 Comments

I am extremely sad about the bombings yesterday in Boston, my prayers go out to everyone affected by the tragedy. It’s so unfortunate that we have to continue to have terrorists live among us. I’m confident they will find who caused this unnecessary tragedy and bring them to justice. I will not live in fear, and it brings this scripture to me when I think about being afraid.

1 Chronicles 28:20 NIV ~ David also said to Solomon his son, “Be strong and courageous, and do the work. Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord God, my God is with you. He will not fail you or forsake you until all the work for the service of the temple of the Lord is finished.

Please pray for the people of Boston, for healing, understanding, love and forgiveness.

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Filed Under: Currently Tagged With: boston, fear, love, prayer

Spring Cleaning Time!

March 25, 2013 by Whitney 6 Comments

Now that it’s officially spring, time to do a little cleaning. That also includes your closet and anything else that you are holding on to that you need to let go of. Some of the clothes you are holding on to are for two reasons, to lose the weight, or come back in style. I know, I have those same outfits in my closet. You are probably reading this thinking, I’m not about to get rid of this suit, I paid $350 and it’s a designer suit. When I bought it 20 years ago, I promised myself the I would never get rid of it, even though I haven’t worn it in 10 years. This woman is crazy.

I am very guilty of this myself. This thing menopause keeps 20 30 extra pounds on me just because and I can’t wear everything in my closet. I am not giving up on losing the extra weight, but I know it’s time to purge and donate some of my clothing. When I lose the weight, I’ll get a few new things. I did this last year when we moved, but I still have things I kept because I just couldn’t let go. I’m turning into my mother, love you momma but I am. She kept clothes forever. When she passed away in 2003, I was the one who went through her closet since I was the surviving daughter. My mother had clothes in her closet from 1970, seriously. She was very particular and had everything stored properly and neatly. I almost felt guilty giving most of it away, no one wanted it and I was taller and heavier than my mom. I did however keep her designer handbags and carry them to this day. Love the vintage feel when I carry them.

Funny, I don’t have a problem going through my girls’ closet, because children grow and I can’t stand their closet to be cluttered. I give away their clothes every year, but very little in that give-away pile comes from my closet. My closet isn’t cluttered, I just hate giving my clothes away. I’m gonna make that change this year, some of the clothes are getting close to 10 years old and I simply don’t wear them anymore. That also includes shoes. That’s gonna hurt because I love shoes, I might have to rethink the shoes. I’m gonna try to follow this philosophy that if I haven’t worn/used it in 3 years, I’m giving it away to someone that would get use out of the clothing or object.

I may as well do it for the rest of my things, household items is my next project. I moved them twice last year and don’t use half that stuff. Ok, some of it is from my first marriage in 1987. I know, let it go and I will. That will empty about 4 or 5 boxes in my storage area. Wonder what makes us hold on to stuff the way we do? My husband will not throw away boxes, if we’ve purchased something, we still have the box for it. He also has that set of large, I mean huge speakers from when we had the big stereos! He doesn’t even have the stereo any longer but refuses to get rid of the speakers. So between me and my old wedding gifts, his box thing and those speakers, we could clear up a bunch of stuff and have room for that refrigerator that they took apart when we moved in December. Yes, my brand new refrigerator that we can’t use because we are renting now. They had to take it apart to get it in the townhouse. I still get heated when I go down there and look at it all taken apart like a project or something to do.

I have several organizations in my area that I donate to, Goodwill, Vietnam Veterans of America, Salvation Army. We’ll have a big donation coming in the next few weeks and whoever can come pick this stuff up will get it. Do you all donate clothing and other goods to charity? How often do you purge and give away clothing and other items?

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Filed Under: Currently, Lifestyle, Marriage, Menopause Mania

What’s Brewing at The Mocha Cafe

March 15, 2013 by Whitney 8 Comments

Happy Friday everyone, I’m having Scandal withdrawals. Seriously. It will finally be on next week, I can’t wait!

I have two new articles at Parent Society, one about rejuvenating when you are stressed out and need some alone time, click here for that article and here about my post on job tips for parents over 50 entering the work force again. I’m searching for my next topics to write for them. I try to write specifically for them about issues for the older woman, but I don’t want to take away my ideas for my own space. I love the challenge and will keep writing as long as I can be creative. It’s a good source for busy parents and has some pretty good writing.

The Catholic Church has finally chosen their next Pope. I’m not gonna pretend I understand the religion, I respect everyone’s religion but I will say I’m glad that process is over.

Don’t forget to support Kokoa Magazine, a great online magazine made for us everyday folks, articles about what we like and products we love! Please subscribe, Kita is doing a wonderful job and making her dreams come true.

It’s been a very busy week, got a lot going on, bowling party tonight, spring break next week and they are ready to hit the streets! We’ll probably see what we can find that is “free” or very low cost. My youngest wants to go to Chicago with her school next month. They are taking a chartered bus to the museum and Navy Pier. Here’s the kicker…the trip is $90 and it doesn’t include any food. I can go as a chaperone for $30. I’m gonna allow her to go, but she has to contribute her allowance to help pay for the trip. She seems okay with that until she realizes she won’t have any spending money this weekend. I guess I’m being cheap, but that’s just a bit much, but that bus must really be expensive. I’m not sure if I’m going or not.

I’ve moved my Outfit of the Week~OOTW to my page called Whitney’s Style. I’m gonna use that for everything related with fashion, makeup etc.

Enjoy your weekend and please be good to one another!

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