cafe mocha reflections

Appreciation To My Readers

May 21, 2013 by Whitney 14 Comments

Image courtesy of Stuart Miles / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I was apprehensive at first, not sure if you all would want to hear what I had to say. I stepped out on faith and went for it. You all slowly but surely embraced me and I opened up an decided to share more and more. I don’t know you personally, but I know you. You are my wonderful readers. Mostly women, parents, married and single. The majority of you are bloggers, my friend in this sometimes not so friendly community.

I am so lucky for the readers and followers I have, you all are the best. You are supportive, friendly and extremely honest about the things we discuss on this format. You all are so beautiful, creative, funny, smart and my rock. You’ve embraced my stories about my girls and husband, my menopausal-crazy ways, and all my adventures since I started blogging in December 2011. I love how we do not bring drama to each other, but can agree to disagree when we have to. Drama isn’t necessary. We have so many other things to do in life, we take the time to appreciate what each other has to say.

I always said that I could learn from anyone, and you all have taught me so much about blogging. Don’t ever think that you can’t learn from someone by their life experience or any format because you can. I’m still learning and starting to broaden my horizon when it comes to blogging. Thank you all from the bottom of my heart. I have a couple of things planned for you all in the near future and we are gonna have fun with it.

Blogging has humbled me in so many ways, brought out the best in me, made me think about my actions and how I could make a difference. My goal is to make a difference, explore my options and make the best of this format. Let me know what you would like to hear from me and I will do my best to make it happen, if I can’t I’ll communicate that as well. You all have made it a pleasure and I will have an appreciation very soon to thank you all for my support. MUAH!!!

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Filed Under: Inspirational, Relationships Tagged With: appreciation, blogging challenge, readers

A Challenge of Love and Marriage

May 20, 2013 by Whitney 26 Comments

Hey everyone, happy Monday. Today I’m gonna share with everyone that you don’t always need to spend a lot of money to have fun. This past Friday was my 1st wedding anniversary. My husband took the day off so we could hang out and spend the day together. The finances were very low because the week before it was Mother’s Day and we just didn’t have it. We decided to take advantage of some good old fashion sight seeing. I was excited, because I still haven’t seen everything here in St Louis and I’ve been here almost 3 years.

I mentioned Friday at The Cafe about how we went down to Laclede’s Landing and the Gateway Arch, didn’t cost us a thing other than parking which was $1.00. This location is downtown and we were on the Mississippi River, so we walked and enjoyed the scenery. It was the first time in a long time there were no expectations, stress or disagreements about anything. No distractions such as bills, jobs or other people and their problems. I had also mentioned that we went to lunch afterward, so let me be more specific about where we ate. It may have sounded like we went to a restaurant, when actually we went to White Castle. I don’t eat there much and he LOVES that place. We drove through the city, picked up our food and went home to watch a movie. Sleep hit us both before we actually put the movie in and the girls were home from school then.

We spent a total of $14 for lunch and parking. We laughed, talked and I remembered why I married him. I asked a lady if she would take our picture and that’s the memory we made. I made a promise that when things get rough to remember why we are together, and not to give up. Money comes and goes, situations causes finances to change, but we are in this together.

I started this 30 Day Marriage Challenge just to see if I could do everything on the list. Actually, it’s not anything on the list that isn’t hard, but certain things that I have neglected as a wife. I’m joining Joi at Rx Fitness Lady on her 7 day blog challenge, I may not do all 7 days, but I will participate as much as I can. The button is on my sidebar on the right, please join us and have some fun. Today is about solving a problem. My problem solving topics is how to have fun on a limited budget and my 30 day marriage challenge. Sometimes in life, it’s all about simplicity, we make things so hard. Have fun, enjoy one another and respect your marriage and/or relationships. Have a good day everyone!

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via imom.com on Pinterest

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Filed Under: Family, Marriage, Relationships Tagged With: 30 day marriage challenge, family, finances, love, marriage

What’s Brewing at The Cafe

May 17, 2013 by Whitney 4 Comments

Scandal Season 2 Cast - H 2012

Happy Friday everyone! Hope you all had a chance to get over Scandal! Whew! We are gonna have withdrawals for the next four months probably. Are you gonna be able to go without it over the summer? The DAD, really?? None of us saw that coming. I did however know that Cyrus was gonna have a heart attack sooner or later. Quinn scared me a bit last night, her adrenaline was flowing last night and I could feel it. That was just crazy. There was so many twist and turns in that one hour of TV. I will say this, I’m glad Shonda worked it out so that Olivia and Fitz had to end their affair. Fitz recited what Liv told him to Mellie and then he went crawling back to her last night with his head down. Wow….great drama, gonna miss it.

I saw the video of the woman in Philadelphia whose baby was in the stroller and it rolled on to the track. I am happy that the baby will be fine, but let me say that we have to do better at being distracted from our cell phones and other devices that we aren’t paying attention to what’s going on. I’m trying my best not to pass judgement, because I know this frightened her and hopefully she has learned a lesson or two about what to do. It’s just not worth it when we focus on those devices when we should be doing something else.

School is almost out, they are gonna be home for one week, then have summer school for three weeks. It’s almost not worth it, except my daughter will have band camp. She wants to audition for the jazz band next year, I sure hope she makes it. They had their concert on Wednesday night and she had a small lead. Of course I sat in the wrong place and the teacher was standing right where she was sitting from my angle. I did this same thing when my oldest was in the band, I couldn’t change seats because it’s so crowded. I managed to get one or two pictures when the teacher moved, but that’s it.

My husband and I celebrated our 1st wedding anniversary today. It was a quiet day, nothing special, no distractions and time alone. We went down by the Gateway Arch and Laclede’s Landing which is this nice area that has cobblestone streets and restaurants, walked around and had some lunch. We may go to dinner next week, but it’s ok if we don’t. I so appreciated the time alone and was able to relax, talk and enjoy the day. We didn’t discuss bills, issues or anything else that causes stress and no distractions. I even did day one of the 30 day marriage challenge, I asked him if it was something I could help him with today. He was receptive and said everything was ok.

I want to thank everyone for their kind words as I shared my story on how cancer has affected my life. It was sad reminiscing on their illness, but it was necessary to continue to bring awareness to cancer and the American Cancer Society. Have a wonderful weekend!

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Filed Under: The Mocha Cafe Tagged With: American Cancer Society, anniversary, family, scandal

My Family and Cancer ~ A Sponsored Video

May 16, 2013 by Whitney 10 Comments

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of the American Cancer Society. All thoughts and opinions are my own but I am honored to share my story as part of the American Cancer Society’s 100th Birthday Celebration.

My mother and sister both died of lung cancer. My sister was went through this terrible disease first and mostly by herself. She came to live with me in 1996 to get away from things. I believed she knew something but didn’t share it at the time. She told me when she asked if she could live with me that she wanted us to be closer. We are 15 years apart, she is older. To think that she had to endure that illness without family still haunts me to this day. She moved out and spent the last months of her life with a man as his wife. We found out she was extremely ill about one week before she died. I will never forget that call at 3:00 in the morning, my momma calling me crying that I couldn’t understand what she was saying. I knew it wasn’t good, my daddy took the phone from her and told me the news, my sister was dying. We put a plan in action and got my parents, and her sons to California to see her and spend time with her. The cancer had metastasized to her brain and they told my family she had days left. She was on a respirator and wasn’t able to speak. We couldn’t get many answers but only that she probably had the disease for about 9 months to a year. She held on until my nephew left and she passed away when the plane took off. She was 49, three months shy of her 50th birthday.

Momma’s battle was about the same except we were able to go through this fight with her. Something just wasn’t right about her, she wasn’t paying bills, forgetting things she would never forget. Then one day she fell down the basement stairs at their home and my dad called me. We rushed her to the emergency room and the emergency room doctor came out and asked my daddy if he knew momma had lung cancer. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing, my daddy and I was hit hard with that awful news. We took her home and to the doctor and found out what our fears were, it was lung cancer and the cancer was at stage 4. It was heart breaking, watching your mother go through the diagnosis, various treatments including chemotherapy and radiation, while watching her try to be strong. The treatments made her so weak, I knew momma was scared. She asked me if I thought God was gonna get her through this. I told her of course but I was scared too. The treatments made her weak, her hair fall out and she lost a lot of weight. I remember having the conversation with her oncologist that it was nothing else they could do and we scheduled the meeting with hospice for momma. My brother moved back to Kansas City to help and we learned how to take care of our mother. Momma was diagnosed in July 2003 and died December 26, 2003.

One of the reasons I wanted to do this post was to share what my family learned from our experience. Early detection is a key and that means going in for regular checkups, taking better care of ourselves and early detection. The American Cancer Society will be 100 years old this year and with that milestone more lives are being saved because of their dedication and research. They have played a role in most of the cancer research breakthrough in recent history, which means a decline in cancer deaths in our country.

I want to support the American Cancer Society reach their goals by ensuring that their research gets the funding it needs, making sure people get the help they need, access to health care, preventive screenings and improve our quality of life.

Please look at the video from Mary J Blige and share with me how cancer has affected your life. Have a great day everyone.

This post is sponsored by the American Cancer Society.

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Filed Under: Health & Wellness Tagged With: American Cancer Society, death, family, love

Weekend Memories

May 13, 2013 by Whitney 10 Comments

Had a great weekend. Saturday the girls and I hung out all day. They wanted to go shopping to buy me something for Mother’s Day. We went to the Air Force Base it was grocery shopping day out there, and they love going. They were having a drawing on some items for Mother’s Day, so I decided to enter. Guess who was the first winner? That’s right me! Here’s what I won…

I love wristlets, I own 4 and to think I won a nice Coach one? Loving it. I was so excited, I wanted to do my happy dance, but my daughter had the nerve to tell me not to embarrass her. I should have broke out, but I was too excited about winning! A free gift, too awesome!

My girls were very giving generous with mom, they spent their allowance to buy me a gift. I told them to just buy one card because greeting cards are so expensive and didn’t want them to spend all their money. This is what they bought me. Too cute, it’s on my desk. My youngest picked this, I just know she did. I appreciate them so much, we had a ball Saturday.

We attended church yesterday, very good service. It was packed of course. I thought about my momma a few times, I did ok until I was sitting in the car by myself. I miss her a lot. We didn’t go out to dinner like I wanted because I had a lot of work to do that needed to be completed by today, so I spent the rest of the day at my desk working. Then I got my gift from my husband.

I’ve never had Shari’s Berries before. They were good, very sweet…very. The girls will probably enjoy a few of them. I could only eat one, they were huge. I had a good weekend, blessed and grateful for the love of my family. How was your Mother’s Day/weekend?

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Filed Under: Currently, Family Tagged With: family, gifts, mother's day

What’s Brewing at The Cafe

May 10, 2013 by Whitney 6 Comments

I have several things to discuss today, Scandal, Jodi Arais and the young women from Cleveland.

Scandal, I need a class on what happened last night. So many twists and turns. I didn’t expect Billy Chambers to be the mole and I knew we couldn’t trust David Rosen, he messed up the whole look and feel of being a gladiator. It went by so fast. What am I gonna do while it’s on hiatus?

They found Jodi Arais guilty of first degree murder. I hope she has to spend the rest of her life in prison. I was amazed how people traveled to Phoenix for the trial and it took on a life for them. I don’t have the resources to go and sit through a trial like that.

The three young women they found held against their will in Cleveland, Amanda Berry, Gina DeJesus and Michele Knight. As the details start to come out about what happened while those girls were living in that house has made me sick to my stomach. You can’t even call it living, it was straight survival for them and I’m so happy they survived and have been rescued. In the next few weeks it will all be out and I will be praying for them while they adjust to being back with their families and having to face the man that did this to them in the court system. Let’s continue to pray for their recovery and the conviction of the man who did this to them.

Last minute Mother’s Day gift ideas.

I like plants instead of flowers.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via ProFlowers on Pinterest

I love my smell good stuff.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Bath & Body Works on Pinterest

I have one of these in red, I love wristlets, grab & go!

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Coach on Pinterest

To all mothers, I wish you a Happy Mother’s Day. To the dads, aunties, God mother’s and everyone else that has a role in a child’s life, I wish you a Happy Mother’s Day as well. Please continue to love your mother and learn how to forgive. You only get one mother and I miss my momma so much. Tell them you love them and thank them for being mom. Have a great weekend everyone.

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Filed Under: The Mocha Cafe Tagged With: kidnapped girls, mother's day, scandal

A Mother’s Love

May 9, 2013 by Whitney 4 Comments

I have been blessed with two beautiful daughters. It’s been an experience that I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world. I didn’t have my first child until I was 33 years old, everyone in the family had given up on the thought of me having any children. Up until then, I was an aunt and had been very comfortable with that position since I was 4 years old. I was a good auntie too, especially when I got older and was able to buy good gifts and help out on an occasion.

In 1996 I had a beautiful daughter, slanted eyes and straight black hair. I just held her and looked at her and would whisper to her, momma’s gonna do everything she can to take care of you. It was bittersweet, because my family wasn’t there for her birth. A few hours after she was born they told me she had jaundice. All I heard was jaundice and brain damage. I lost my mind, I didn’t want to leave my baby at the hospital but I knew she needed the treatment. I was at the hospital with her until they let me bring her home.

Three years later, I discover that I’m gonna have another baby. Surprise, surprise! I was not expecting this because we used birth control, but you know nothing is 100% unless it’s abstinence. My mother was elated, she had told me on several occasions that she didn’t believe in having an only child. I was 37 and felt I was a bit old to be having another child. I had a difficult pregnancy with her, flu, pregnancy high blood pressure. I had to have an amniocentesis and go to the doctor every 3 weeks. It was a struggle but she looked just like her big sister when she was born in 2000, except she was my little chocolate drop.

Now I was a mother of two girls. The house was full of life, toys everywhere and all the duties that come with babies and toddlers. It’s been wonderful being their mother. I thank God for allowing me the opportunity to love, mold and show them how to be young ladies. We are entering the phase of teenage years for my youngest and adulthood for my oldest. It’s gonna be hard releasing them into this world, but I know I must do it.

My Mother’s Day gift is to have them here with me beautiful, healthy and very much loved. They want to buy something for me and I’m good with whatever they get. My parents would be so proud of them, I know they are watching over their grand babies.

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Filed Under: Family, Relationships Tagged With: children, love, mother's day, motherhood

Fashion Trends I Can No Longer Wear

May 7, 2013 by Whitney 14 Comments

I consider myself to be fashion forward, have style and try to keep up with trends that fit my age, style and body type. You can see I have some style from my Polyvore activities. It’s one thing I just have a hard time working with, skinny jeans. The word “skinny” should have let me know they weren’t for me, not this woman. I own two pair and they are the most uncomfortable things I’ve ever owned. I have them in the correct size, but my issue is I’m bottom heavy, hips and thighs. They suck the life out of my poor thighs when I wear them! If I buy them too big, then they are huge in the waist.

I always wear a long top, whether it’s a sweater, t-shirt or tunic because I believe I need the coverage. Being bottom heavy, I try to be distracting if you know what I mean. One thing about me, if it’s not comfortable, it gets eliminated. I tried but I’m gonna have to put my skinny jeans to rest. I can pick an alternative like straight leg, they have more thigh room. I don’t typically wear jeans when the weather warms up because they are too hot, but with spring coming in so late I’m still wearing jeans and pants. These ankle slacks work well for me during the warmer months and I can put boots on with them during fall and winter months.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Marie Denee, The Curvy Fashionista on Pinterest

This is a nice alternative for me, not as restricting and gives more.

I always wear a long top, whether sweater, t-shirt or tunic because I believe I need the coverage. One thing about me, if it’s not comfortable, it gets eliminated. I tried but I’m gonna have to put my skinny jeans to rest. I can pick an alternative like straight leg, they have more thigh room. I don’t typically wear jeans when the weather warms up because they are too hot, but with spring coming in so late I’m still wearing jeans and pants. I plan to add them to my donate bag and give them away this summer.

The next trend that I tried but can’t do is platform stilettos that are over 4 inches with a 1 inch platform. Anything over that, I can’t do. We are talking sprang ankles and other serious injury here. I can’t walk in them, I walk like Herman the Monster, not a good look. I love most of them, some are too high, but I definitely stay in my lane with these, I don’t even play. This reality happened about two years ago, I bought a cute pair of slingback, platform pumps and walked all over the store in them. I pulled them out to wear to church and about broke my neck in them. I was gonna take them back, but I had them so long I decided to keep them and give them to my best friend when she came to town last year. She loved them and I was glad they had a good home. I love the stilettos but they are out of my league.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Cassie Washington on Pinterest

These are more my style and comfort level, I own quite a few pairs of wedges. They are versatile and I can wear them with dresses or slacks. Now I will say if they are 5 inches or more I can’t do them either. I really like these.

Source: Cafe Mocha Reflections via Meggan Delmonico on Pinterest

I always take a pair of flats with me when appropriate, I know I will need them by the end of the evening or after church. If I’m are attending an event where I will be on my feet for a while, I always take my flat ballerinas that roll up and go in my purse.

Just a few changes I’m making regarding my style. Style is important, but what is equally important is comfort. How do you make the trends work for you?

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